so my mum told me that as a kid she would peel an apple and throw the peel over her shoulder, and the peel would take the shape of the first letter of her future spouse. naturally, i decided to do it and
i’m fucking crying
it says ‘no.’
it literally says NO.
oh my god
with a period, end of story.
perhaps you’re just marrying a norman
AU The Fault In Our Stars where Hazel Grace succumbs to the cancer and dies and in the last scene all you see is Augustus standing out side with a cigarette between his lips and a hand slowly reaching up to light it.
HOW ABOUT NO
WOW I DIDNT KNOW SOMETHING COULD BE WORSE THAN THE ACTUAL ENDING NOPE BYE
i followed my heart and it led me into the fridge
***holds you at gunpoint*** it’s a metaphor you see, I put the killing thing to your head but by not pulling the trigger I don’t go give it the power to do its killing, wait no, don’t call the police, it’s a metaphor
I brought my little brother Spencer as my date and when I told him I was nominated for this [Hot & Funny] award, he told me that if under any circumstances I won, I had to say the following things.
being related to a celebrity: YOU’RE DOING IT RIGHT
OMG WHEN HE LOOKS AT THE CAMERA AT THE END I JUST
when you accidentally type ong instead of omg
OH MY GOSH
I want someone to look at me the way dan looks at phil
What the fuck is this
a government secret
um so lemme get this straight…tiana starts her own business in a time where black women had next to no rights….mulan pretty much saves china and becomes a top ranking military official….but the annoying sister in frozen makes a throwaway line about being gassy and gets lauded as the the first feminist princess??
i could never be a model i can’t even walk across my room without tripping